Sunday, December 14, 2014

It's been a while since I last posted anything...

The last thing I said in my previous post:  "I plan to post much more consistently now that school's over...I hope to catch up this summer by spending much more time updating my stories and as I said, posting more on my blog."


Hahahahahaha. Ha.

Soooooo...that didn't really go as planned.  Obviously.

The last time I posted anything was months ago.  And I didn't post a single thing all summer.  I did work on editing my stories, but this blog has been abandoned for a long time now.

I have come to the conclusion that I am not really capable of keeping my word, at least not as far as updating my blog is concerned.  So I've decided it's best not to make any promises from hereon out, because I can't really predict when I'll have time to post anything.

Needless to say, I'm a little frustrated with myself for leaving my blog abandoned for so long.  Again.  To be fair, I've been pretty busy with college ever since the summer break ended.  But I have no excuse for not posting all summer.  That was a result of sheer laziness, lack of motivation, and a lot of anime-watching.

Over the past few months, I've developed and changed a lot as a person.  I've become even more passionate about social issues than I was before, and I've been getting into other stuff.  For instance, my friend's roommates at her college have inducted me into the K-pop (Korean pop music) fandom.  I mean, I liked K-pop before, but now I'm a full blown fangirl.  But it's not my fault K-pop is so addicting.  Some things just can't be helped.

I'm still a fan of Jessie J and Lana Del Rey (I remember how I used to gush over them in the early days of this blog), but I've moved on since then and am now exploring other genres, such as the aforementioned K-pop.

Anyway (I'm starting to notice I say that a lot).  In other news, I'm starting to wear makeup more often.  I never did before, since I have sensitive eyes that sometimes have bad reactions to eye makeup.  But lately I've been able to control the reactions.  As long as my eyes aren't triggered into reacting, wearing things like mascara and eyeliner don't bother me anymore and I find I am a lot more comfortable with it now.  I've wanted to try applying winged eyeliner for a long time now, so I did.  This is attempt #2, after a dance performance I had for a hip hop class.

I have freakishly large owlish eyes...

Speaking of hip hop, I have also changed over the past months in the way that I no longer dislike modern dance forms.  I find that I've loosened up a lot more in that respect and am more open to other dance styles.

I am also taking Cultural Anthropology, and may be going to Ireland this summer to study castles and the High Kings of Ireland.  I haven't been to Ireland in years, so I'm pretty excited about that.

I watched a lot of anime over the summer, as well as the first two seasons of Supernatural (a series I became interested in after seeing so much of it on Tumblr).  I've missed Blogger.  But Tumblr is more accessible in a way.  It takes less energy and motivation to simply like and reblog a post, or publish a short text post, or to scroll through a tag.  Posting on Blogger, at least for me, takes a lot more thought and effort.  I think part of the reason I've been gone so long is because I lacked the motivation and energy it takes to update.  That and college, which has been taking up a lot of my time.

I remember that I used to dislike when people didn't care.  Sorry to disappoint Past Me, but I have become just that.  I no longer care.  And I said goodbye to my motivation a long time ago.  High School made sure of that.  *shudders* I don't want to think about High School.  That was a dark time.  But thankfully the past is in the past (haha, I made a Frozen reference...I know, I'm lame).

I have so many posts saved in my drafts that I've wanted to publish for a long time, like a Fault in Our Stars review and my top favorite animated films, but I never got around to any of those.  And now, I'm not sure I'll ever get around to them.  I will also probably never finish the Doctor Who tag I started a long time ago, since I don't really watch Doctor Who anymore and have moved on from it.  But who knows, maybe some day I'll get back to that.

But since I've never been able to muster up enough motivation to work on any of those things, I think it would be better if I just let them go.  I'd rather move on and post about the things I'm currently interested in, or else I'd lack motivation in writing.  And since I want (or rather, hope) to start posting on my blog again, I'd rather avoid that.

I've missed Blogger and the friends I made here, so I'm glad to be back.


  1. Welcome back, Banrion! I missed you while you were gone! :) Don't beat yourself up about neglecting the blog, who knows -- the break may have been helpful! Starting back with things you're interested in now definitely sounds like a good idea. I know that when I lose interest in writing a post it takes all the wind out of my sails if I try to force it.

    Oh, and that style of eyeliner looks great on you! :D

    1. Awww thanks! I think I might have needed a break, it just took a while for me to feel like posting again. It wasn't like I didn't want to write anything, but sometimes I feel like all energy and motivation is sucked out of me. I hate writer's block. :P